Last week, I gushed and gushed about James Ellroy's The Black Dahlia, praising the neo-noir tale's slimy portrait of post-WWII Los Angeles and its denizens. Needless to say, I was pretty excited to move on to the next part of Ellroy's "L.A. Quartet," The Big Nowhere.
I'm not really sure how I feel about it yet. I'm about 170 pages in and I'm still waiting for that great moment where you have to keep reading and can't put the book down. I was talking to Zombie about this last week, thinking I'd reached that moment with the book. But then I hit a few slower, less interesting chapters and I found myself not as motivated to pick up the book. Still, I remain optimistic, and Ellroy is far from an "easy" writer. You have to really dedicate yourself to the material. He doesn't mince words or ramble on, so you know every word, character and scene counts. Did I mention it's not easy?
The Big Nowhere kicks off by slowly introducing us to its three protagonists: Sheriff's Deputy Danny Upshaw, a young up-and-comer with promise and a textbook approach to detective work; Mal Considine, a divorced cop trying to keep custody of his immigrant stepson and Buzz Meeks, a corrupt ex-cop who's on the dole for Howard Hughes and local mob boss Mickey Cohen. Set during the red scare of the early fifties, the novel finds the three characters inching closer together amid a backdrop of labor disputes, Communist witch hunts and a series of grisly murders.
At first, the three characters seem distant and unrelated, but as the novel progresses, all three become involved with the same problem: weeding out Communists from the UAES, an actors' organization on strike and costing Hollywood bags of money. I'm not sure how much that interests me, to be honest, but there's also the case of the potential serial killer, which is Upshaw's thread as the story begins. And sometimes, after reading a great book by a great author, you allow the author some modicum of faith when reading a later, more complex work. That's what's going on here. I imagine that after a few more chapters the story will kick in and I won't be able to put it down. Until then, I'll push through and wait for that moment.
This week, though I didn't do a lot of writing, I did something that all writers - no matter how seasoned or "emerging" they might be - should really do. I read scripts. I read a script that Onyx lent me, which was nothing that anyone in the League had written. I read a script for someone I met at one of the Meetups that we've been going to here in the City. And I read material submitted by Leaguers for our most recent meeting, which was last Thursday.
Every week, king suckerman asks his readers what they're reading. As my family members will acknowledge, it's very odd for me to be a huge advocate of reading. I grew up hating reading. Unless it had Batman in it (and even then), you'd be hard pressed to get me to voluntarily open a book and sit down and process the words printed on its pages. It's only been relatively recently that I've done so willingly - and enjoyed it. Yet recently, I've taken to reading. I read on the train to work each morning and evening. I read when I get home (when I'm not writing). And, more and more, I find that I love reading. It's something that my father has done for as long as I've known him. The man has stacks of unread books scattered around my parents' house, because every inch of bookshelf is packed with books that he's read time and time again.
We spend a lot of time on this site talking about writing, but with the exception of suckerman's discussions, we fail to mention one of the most crucial aspects of writing - yep, you guessed it. Reading. If you plan on making your career as a screenwriter, it's imperative that you read not only other scripts - look at those that won awards, those you loved, those you want to imitate, and even those you hate - but read classical material, as well. I'm currently making my way through Dante's Inferno (on my way through the Divine Comedy). There's a reason this and other material is considered "classic;" it's proven itself time and time again. More and more stories are being told, which are based on 10-12 core formulas, depending on who you ask. When we went through NYU, we were taught that there were really only 10 stories, and everything since they were first put to paper has been some adaptation of them.
Reading is crucial to writing. Yes, what you're reading can impact your writing. But that's not always a bad thing. Certain stories and elements work for a reason. I'm just doing my damnedest to expand my horizons as a reader, and hopefully, in the process, as a writer, too.
"He's the first hero of the 21st century... and our only hope!"
In honor of the opening of JCVD in New York, it seemed a natural choice to highlight one of the myriad classics laid on celluloid by Mr. Jean-Claude Van Damme. But where to start? Universal Soldier? Hard Target? Timecop? Street Fighter? Universal Soldier: The Return? So many wonderful, wonderful little turds - nowhere near enough time. (Side note: JCVD was awesome. Now, back to the lame...) After much consultation with the League (ok, well, just Onyx) I decided to start with 1989's Cyborg, directed by Albert F. Pyun, who was the early '90s action film answer to Ed Wood, Jr.
You can't really place much blame on Mr. Van Damme for this one - Cyborg was only his second starring role in a film (this was made right after Bloodsport) and at this point he was still struggling with the English language. It really doesn't help that he was under the direction of one of the few working men in Hollywood with more ridiculous movies to his name than Mr. Van Damme. Director Albert Pyun, to put it lightly, sucks incredibly. Albert Pyun sucks with passion, consistency and abandon. If making a shitty movie was dunking a basketball, Albert Pyun would be Michael Jordan. I'm talking about a Uwe Boll-level of sucking, kiddos. When it comes to taking a dump onto celluloid, Albert Pyun will forever be a Hall of Famer.
One look at his IMDB page will paint the whole feces-covered portrait. Bulletface? Brain Smaser: A Love Story? Adrenalin: Fear the Rush? Max Havoc: Curse of the Dragon? Even their titles are silly. Cyborg received a 4.3 out of 10 on IMDB, marking it as one of his highest-rated.
Pyun has two major obsessions: cyborgs and kickboxers. Many of his movies has at least ONE of these elements: Nemesis (1993) - In the future, chaos is rampant as 'information terrorists' threaten to destroy order in society. Alex is a part-man-part-machine LAPD cop who is the best at what he does. (This was followed by Nemesis II: Nebula, Nemesis III: Prey Harder, and Nemesis IV: Death Angel. None of these movies are rated higher that a 3.1 on IMDB.) Kickboxer 4: The Aggressor (1994) - A kickboxer must travel to Mexico to save his wife from a savage international terrorist. (Pyun directed two of the Van Damme-less sequels to the original Kickboxer.)
Some of his movies incorporate BOTH elements:
Knights (1993) - In the future, a kickboxer and a robot lead a revolution against ruling cyborgs.
Heatseeker (1995) - A kickboxing champion is forced to fight cyborgs in a tournament when the company kidnaps his fiancee.
The subject of today's lecture, Cyborg, has both.
At 0:06 - Right off the bat we're treated to the Cannon Video logo. We KNOW we're in for a treat. It's sort of like the Nintendo Seal of Quality, except for things that suck. At 0:13 - Or the not-too-distant past, in case you're watching this trailer in the year 2008. At 0:20 - Is that the male cast of Dead or Alive 4? At 0:26 - NO! Not food, JC! NOT food! At 0:29 - Ok, that's definitely Zack from Dead or Alive. At 0:32 - Seizure alert. At 0:36 - Was that actor's voice re-dubbed by a muppet? At 0:48 - A cyborg Sinead? At 1:05 - Yikes - what IS that guy? A cyborg? Werewolf? Vampire? Running back for the Buffalo Bills? At 1:14 - I have absolutely nothing to say about this frame. At 1:15 - "BRARRRGGGHHH!" At 1:17 - "BREAAAAAUUUUGGGGH!" At 1:18 - "RUUUUURRRRRRRGHH!" At 1:20 - "RAAAUUUUGGGGGHHH!"
Seriously, how many times do guys scream in the last 20 seconds of this trailer? If this trailer is indicative of the film's content, then roughly 1/3 of the movie is shirtless guys screaming.
"BLEAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH!"
The movie Cyborg was never really meant to be. The film was originally meant to be a sequel to the live action Dolph Lundgren He-Man movie Masters of the Universe, which was to be shot back-to-back with a Pyun-helmed Spider-Man movie. Both deals fell through (though Pyun later directed another Marvel Comics-based film: the 1990 steampile Captain America, starring Dolph Lundgren). In an attempt to recoup some of the costs of these two movies, Pyun used the sets and costumes they'd already paid for to shoot a low-budget cyborg/kickboxer movie starring the then-little-known Muscles from Brussels.
To top things off, Jean-Claude Van Damme's character isn't even a cyborg. You'd think he was from the title, right? The villains aren't cyborgs, either. The only cyborg in this movie is a lame chick that Van Damme occasionally saves.
There is so much that is stupid about this movie. For God knows what reason, all the characters are named after guitars. Van Damme's character is named Gibson Rickenbacker. The villain is named Fender Tremolo. There's also a Marshall Strat and a Pearl Prophet. Agggh.
Throw in an overblown (and hilarious) crucifixion scene and a bunch of flashbacks where Van Damme wears a wig that's only slightly less silly than one a clown would wear and you've got one hell of a movie:
Trivia: Did you know Van Damme's first credited film role was playing "Gay Karate Man" in the movie Monaco Forever?
I guess in the end Van Damme really had nowhere to go but up from here. Pyun, however, continues to churn out turd after stinker with no signs of stopping. Damn you, Pyun. Dammmmmmn yooooouuuuuu!
"RAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGHHH!"
Trailer Trash is a weekly tribute to oddball, cheesy and often just plain terrible movie trailers. Writers: These movies got made... so can yours! You can read through our archive by clicking here.
What, When, Where is a weekly guide to select screenings, discussions and events in the NYC-area of interest to screenwriters.
Opening this weekend...
JCVD, written by Mabrouk El Mechri and Frédéric Bénudis, dir. by Mabrouk El Mechri
Premise:Between his tax problems and his legal battle with his wife for the custody of his daughter, these are hard times for the action movie star who finds that even Steven Seagal has pinched a role from him! In JCVD, Jean-Claude Van Damme returns to the country of his birth to seek the peace and tranquility he can no longer enjoy in the United States.
Playing at: Angelika, BAM, Landmark Sunshine
It's Jean Claude Van F'in Damme, people. And I've read it's actually good, even beyond all the awesome kicking. Onyx and I are heading to a screening after work tomorrow - you'll be hearing about this one, no doubt.
Premise:A young zombie named Otto appears on a remote highway. He has no idea where he came from or where he is going. After hitching a ride to Berlin and nesting in an abandoned amusement park, he begins to explore the city. Soon he is discovered by underground filmmaker Medea Yarn, who begins to make a documentary about him with the support of her girlfriend, Hella Bent, and her brother Adolf, who operates the camera. Meanwhile, Medea is still trying to finish Up with Dead People, the epic political-porno-zombie movie that she has been working on for years. She convinces its star, Fritz Fritze, to allow the vulnerable Otto to stay in his guest bedroom. When Otto discovers that he has a wallet that contains information about his past, before he was dead, he begins to remember details about his ex-boyfriend, Rudolf. He arranges to meet him at the schoolyard where they met, with devastating results.
Playing at: IFC Center
Just when you think every subgenre of zombie movie has been done, here comes a gay zombie movie! Points for trying something new.
REPO! THE GENETIC OPERA, written by Darren Smith and Terrance Zdunich, dir. by Darren Lynn Bousman
Premise: A worldwide epidemic encourages a biotech company to launch an organ-financing program similar in nature to a standard car loan. The repossession clause is a killer, however.
Playing at: Angelika
Just look at that screencap up above. And can we mention this is a musical? I'm intrigued. Correct me if I'm wrong, but we haven't had a real cult musical since Hedwig, right? (Only big ones that come to mind are Cannibal!, Saddest Music in the World and Moulin Rouge, but none of those really hit the midnight movie crowds...)
THE GUITAR, written by Amos Poe and Gillian Horvat, directed by Amy Redford
Premise:The life of a woman is transformed after she is diagnosed with a terminal disease, fired from her job and abandoned by her boyfriend. Given two months to live, she throws caution to the wind to pursue her dreams.
Playing at: Landmark Sunshine ROLE MODELS, written by Paul Rudd and David Wain, dir. by David Wain
Premise: Wild behavior forces a pair of energy drink reps to enroll in a Big Brother program.
Playing: All over.
Had to put something at least semi-mainstream up here. I've always liked Paul Rudd - and the cast is pretty good here. I've never been a fan of the nutty-children genre, though.
One of the members of our Facebook group recently gave me a heads up about the following contest: the GREAT AMERICAN SCREENPLAY COMPETITION, presented by ACEFEST.
For 3 years now, ACEFEST has been one of the most anticipated annual events on the industry calendar. The American Cinematic Experience goes far beyond film exhibition and into the very most primitive stages of production - writing. The Great American Screenplay Competition is seeking the best American writers from coast to coast and it could be you! With an always impressive roster of judges, a growing bundle of prizes and nearly 4,000 industry players waiting eagerly to see the winner's work, this is your chance to get your script seen!
We are accepting screenplay submissions in all categories from October 16, 2008 - January 16, 2009. Submit early and save on fees!
Obviously, the League cannot endorse this contest from our own experience, since none of us have submitted to it before. However, I can tell you - as a vote of confidence - that the company I work for works closely with NYFA, one of the sponsors, and in fact a number of my former coworkers have left jobs here to go work there.
Here at the League, we've all tried the contest route before, to varying degrees of success. The Great American Screenplay Competition might not be one of the better known comps. out there, but that's no reason to cast it off. All competitions are unknown at some point in their history (uh...usually at the beginning), and even the smallest ones can be a great stepping stone and resume builder. *Any win can look great on a query letter.* So, especially for you New York based writers - NYFA, or the New York Foundation for the Arts, is a source of funding for many NYC artists - it's worth checking this one out. It might just be the competition for you.
Anyone who has participated in the past, either in ACEFEST or the Great American Screenplay Competition, please let us know what your experience was.
From my weekly Trailer Trash posts, you can probably guess I'm a big fan of the late Mystery Science Theater 3000. Keith Phipps has a great interview with a few of the former writers (and stars) of the show over here at the AV Club.
The Screenwriters League is a collective of NYC-based writers sharing their experiences as they build their careers from the ground up, and hoping to impart any knowledge they gain along the way.
