The Writing Week (Vol. 5) part 228 - Simplify, Simplify, Simplify

I think it's nearly impossible to make a good script too simple. Look at some of the most successful loglines and movies. Die Hard always jumps to mind when talking about the beauty of simplicity. A New York cop tries to rescue a group of hostages from terrorists in an office building. That's a pretty straightforward premise. The plot has twists and turns and complications, but the driving goal is direct and simple. 


W.A., my collaborator, and I had a call with our producer at the end of last week to talk about the sci-fi spec outline we submitted earlier this month. The call was an illuminating one, though as often happens, the outline we thought we had primed for the pages stage was revealed to be overly complex and confusing. due to its nature as a sc-fi, there's already an inherent degree of complexity in the premise. But the execution doesn't have to be nearly as multifaceted as we were making it. As the producer put it, "you have three layers of things going on in this world, which hardly seem connected." We thought the elements were working together, but clearly they weren't. 


With that little kick in the pants, W.A. and I met yesterday to discuss things. Going into the meeting, I wasn't sure where either of us stood. I was beginning to think we might be facing a larger re-write, but I had no idea if he felt the same. The meeting proved quite fruitful, with us stripping some large elements completely, reducing others, centralizing the story, and working in a great overarching goal that we had subconsciously already been working our way toward. Over the course of an hour and a half discussion, the script became a lot simpler and more manageable in scope, with fewer rules to explain and locations to justify. What was left, though, after we peeled off layer after layer wasn't weaker - it was stronger and far more engaging due to its concision. Both W.A. and I walked out of the meeting jazzed about what we had come up with and hope that those changes become the bedrock for the pages I soon hope to start drafting. 


The simplest stories and often be the most difficult to write. I remember thinking that my Medieval spec was going to be a breeze. It's a simple revenge thriller, but man oh man was it hard to crack. I still haven't figured it out, and I'm two full drafts into it. The protagonist's drive is still very simple, but that doesn't mean that I can be lax in my writing. The story still has to flow organically and logically, and while the overall arc was and is clear in my head, the plot points aren't. 


As the producer also said when we were talking, the outline stage is the best time to catch these changes and work on streamlining the script. The last thing you want is to wind up having to do a page one rewrite because you didn't take the time to plan before you sat down to write. 

Friday Writing Roundup

A selection of articles and postings from Leaguers that have appeared in other corners of the internet recently.

Austin (aka Zombie) 

Reissue Review: Sleep - Dopesmoker Reissue

http://consequenceofsound.net/2012/05/album-review-sleep-dopesmoker-reissue/

Album Review: Best Coast - The Only Place

http://www.undertheradarmag.com/reviews/the_only_place/ 

The Writing Week (Vol. 5) part 227 - Keep it Fresh

Later today, I have a call with my co-writer, W.A., and the producer who paired us on our sci-fi spec. It's been about three weeks since I last worked on that project - what with getting it out for review and setting up a phone call at a time convenient for all of us - so I've had some extra time on my hands recently. To fill that gap, I've gone back to the outline of my demon thriller.


It's been fun going back to that project, but of the four main notes I'm trying to incorporate, one is being a real nuisance. Without giving anything away really, the script involves demons living in the world we know. (On the surface, not the most original sounding idea, I'll give you that. But there are, I hope, some really unique things I'm doing with the concept and the notion of demons, hell, and the earth converging.) My manager's overall note was that the demon aspect of the story is really pretty fresh and offers some great visuals, while the human portion of it is fairly prosaic, almost to the detriment of the story as a whole. His reaction was that he loved the demon parts to much that he felt mired in the sequences that didn't involve them and suggested I try to elevate the temporal beats to match those of the supernatural ones. 


I understand his point. In my mind, it's not that huge of an issue; maybe I just see the full story more and know that the demon elements won't be as fantastical as perhaps he envisions them. Or, maybe having somewhat more everyday components will enliven and highlight the paranormal that much more. I'm still not 100% convinced of the need to change things out, but at least for exercise's sake, I'm giving it a whirl. (It's probably worth mentioning that the earthly sections take place in the legal world, so if nothing else, removing them from that arena will limit the number of parallels drawn to The Devil's Advocate.) 


In my quest for change, I'm looking at the unusual and unexpected careers found in "normal life." What haven't we seen on film that often? What creates and aesthetic that holds its own against that of demons and hell, while also being thematically linked to that world? Demonology and hell and good versus evil have certain tones, certain arcane elements that ideally will find a counterpart in the earthly setting I've established. It's tough going, as you can probably guess, mainly because the parallels were easiest to make when I kept the human interactions confined to the legal world. Court room showdowns and guilty versus innocent are the defacto temporal judgments we're all familiar with, so it's such an easy connection to make. I worry about losing those if I transition the setting somewhere else, but the challenge of determining how to retain them is one I'm enjoying so far.


Either way, the key to a solid script is freshness. I feel as though I'm about 2/3 of the way there. Hopefully, the remainder falls into place this weekend. 

Friday Writing Roundup

A selection of articles and postings from Leaguers that have appeared in other corners of the internet recently.

Austin (aka Zombie)

Reissue Review: T.S. Bonniwell - Close

http://www.undertheradarmag.com/reviews/close/

Album Review: Heavy Blanket - Heavy Blanket

http://consequenceofsound.net/2012/05/album-review-heavy-blanket-heavy-blanket/

Zach (aka Cake Man)

The Hunger Games - An Esoteric Adaptation

http://www.screenwritersutopia.com/2012/05/06/the-hunger-games-an-esoteric-adaptation/

Ken Levine Gives His Summer Preview

The ever-funny Ken Levine has once again treated us - the people of the internets - to his recap of the summer movie list. Always good for a laugh.


Part one
Part two
Part three


Thanks, Ken!

Logline Central - Dear Satan

Logline Central is an irregular segment that takes a deeper look at loglines of scripts or projects that have just been purchased, as listed on DoneDealPro.


Every now and then, an idea comes around that makes you think, "Damn, I wish I'd done that instead." Today, Dear Satan is that idea for me. 

Title:	Dear Satan
Logline:	A 7-year old girl accidentally misspells “Santa” in her letter to the North Pole and instead invites Satan to bring her a toy for Christmas.
Writer:	Dan Ewen
Genre:	Comedy
More:	Spec. Conundrum's Bobby & Peter Farrelly will produce.

It's so simple and yet so smart. We've all noticed how eerily similarly spelled Santa and Satan are; one represents joy and goodness and generosity and love, while the other is death and destruction and denial and sin. Same five letters, though, only a little rejiggered. Thus, it makes perfect sense that someone would misaddress the letter. And a child? Of course. I buy that completely. 


Not to get into a debate on religion and the existence of Satan or not, but the logline does a perfect job of informing us of how this world works. Presumably, Santa really does exists and makes his perennial journey around the world each Christmas Eve to deliver toys. The fact that the girl's unfortunate typo addresses her letter to the Devil makes us think that, in this world, Satan is also very much a real force that can interact with the world. We know there's magic and the supernatural in the world of this script, and we also know that those forces pose very legitimate risks or influences. So, naturally, we beg to know the answer - what happens when Satan gets a request to show up with a present?


My search on Dan Ewen didn't reveal much about past writing credentials, unfortunately, though that doesn't mean much.  It looks like he had an earlier sale this past November and one in 2009. He might have ghost-written a ton before that, or been hired to do rewrites, deals that didn't make the trades. Either way, I don't really care. The title is great. The logline is beyond solid (we know the protagonist - the girl - the world, the rules, and the conflict). The idea is incredibly promising; I want to know where it goes. If I was the executive and this came across my desk, you can bet I would ask for the script. Hell, if I had the spending money, I might even pick it up regardless, just for the idea.

The Writing Week (Vol. 5) part 226 - The Waiting Week

Well folks, I won't lie to you. This week has been a bit of a slow one. I still haven't heard back regarding the producer's thoughts on my writing partner's and my outline for a sci-fi action adventure. My manager is also supposed to be giving it a read, but no feedback from him yet, either. And that's fine - I'll be going out of town for the weekend, so it's not as though I'll have much time to work on it anyway. 


The post-Apocalyptic spec is still out there somewhere in the ether. I think we (my manager, agent, and producers) are nearing agreement that we've about turned over as many stones as we can on the project... at least for now. It's kind of a sucky feeling, but not one that comes as a surprise to me. I sense that my manager's been slowly prepping me for the inevitable, "there's not much more we can do for it now," and considering the project's been out in the Hollywood atmosphere for a couple years, I could have guessed as much. Thankfully, I have the collaboration to actively focus on and a couple other ideas or outlines that I can jump back to and will jump back to. We're trying for one more A-lister to come on board attached to star, but I think that's more in the wish and prayer category than a strategy we're putting any real money behind.


I began to get back to the demon thriller spec, which was nice. By get back to, I mean I re-read the outline I drafted months ago. I was pleased to see that it reads pretty well. In fact, my manager had some thoughts about it that wouldn't change the pacing or overall structure in any major way, but would alter some situations and potentially eliminate certain parallels in the story that work effectively at present. It's hard to tell whether I'm just being intractable or even just lazy, or if there's merit to my desire not to implement his changes. I like to think that I'll be able to achieve an equally healthy outline for an even more unique story by implementing his suggestions, but I'm currently beset by that ever tempting, partially deleterious affliction whereby writers refuse to tamper with something that works. 


Ah well... if nothing else, an attempt at revising yet another outline that seems well-structured might just prove that the current incarnation is the most robust, most effective. And Hell, it felt great to keep working, and in a field where the temptation to procrastinate is ever-present, the drive to work needs to be embraced. After all, who knows how long the next writing break might last.